5 Tips To Boost Your Self-Confidence
Dee 
The American Psychological Association defines self-confidence as "a belief that one is capable of successfully meeting the demands of a task."
In other words, it’s a feeling of trust you have in your own abilities, qualities, and judgment. It’s usually situation specific where you have confidence in a particular area of expertise but feel less confident in other areas.
Having a healthy level of self-confidence usually helps you become more successful in your personal and professional life and there’s no doubt that it even affects how you show up or present yourself to others.
If you’re struggling with self-confidence right now, it’s probably hard to see all the things you’ve already done in your life so now would be a good time to look back at how far you’ve come.
1. Look at how far you’ve come
You may doubt that you’ve achieved a lot if your self-confidence is low but, no matter what, you will definitely have accomplished a good number of things in your life. Sometimes it’s hard to see what you’ve achieved when you feel like you’re trapped but you can definitely overcome this feeling.
There are two ways to do this – both involve sitting down in a quiet spot with a pen and paper. The first method is the Journey method which you can easily do if you journal (Focus Tribe Online has a comprehensive journaling course which covers everything you need to know on this subject and includes a workbook and prompts).
Think about where you were when you started the Journey you’re currently taking. Maybe you’re trying to start a new career, reach a new goal, or something else.
Where did you start? Write that down. What did you do next? What have you done since then? Write done everything you’ve done to advance yourself on this path. Everything… from the smallest to the largest item.
What have you learned? About yourself and the goal. Write it down. What worked and what didn’t? Write everything down. Then look back over the list and see how far you’ve come. You might not be where you want to be yet, but you’ll see that you’ve come a long way from the starting line!
The second method – and this is for overall confidence – is the Success method. It’s the same process, only this time you write down every single one of your life’s accomplishments. Put everything you’ve ever succeeded at on the list. Include big and small items. Scored top of the class in 4thgrade reading? Put it down. Run a 2km race? It goes on the list.
It’s also a good idea to ask friends and family for help. They might remind you of things you have forgotten about.
When you’ve finished with either of these lists, you’ll have a tangible record of things you’ve accomplished in your life. It doesn’t matter how much you feel like you’ve failed, this list will show you things you’ve succeeded at too.
Use these lists to remind yourself that you can and have accomplished things in the past. If you’ve succeeded in the past, you can do so in the future. You can reach any goal you set. All you have to do is believe in yourself!
2. Affirmations and power poses
A quick way to boost your confidence is with affirmations and power poses – you might want to use these before an important event such as a job interview, a big meeting, or speech. You can also build your confidence permanently using affirmations if you practise them regularly.
Here’s how to use these techniques:
Speaking affirmations
Find a quiet place with a mirror. Look yourself in the eye (yes, it can be hard to do) and repeat, several times, affirmations that you resonate with. Speaking them aloud is preferable, but if you can’t find a place where you can be alone and don’t want people to hear, repeat them silently.
Examples of this could be saying affirmations like:
I can do this.
I am confident.
I am capable of great things.
I am becoming a better version of myself.
I deserve everything I want from life.
I am competent, capable, and intelligent.
Power poses
A power pose is a way of standing or sitting that increases your confidence and makes you feel like you can take on the world. Here are a few for you to try.
The LBJ – Find a nearby item at waist height, such as a table or chair. Place your hands on it and lean slightly forward. This pose increases your confidence while giving you a sense of power and control over the room.
The Standing Power Pose – Stand up straight, head upright and keep your feet planted firmly on the ground, slightly apart, and hold your arms open. This makes you feel and look confident without being intimidating.
The Superwoman Pose – Stand up straight with your shoulders back, chin slightly raised and your feet apart. Put your hands on your hips and imagine you have a cape on your shoulders. This instantly makes you feel confident.
The Sitting Power Pose – Sit upright in a chair. Keep both feet firmly planted on the ground. Keep the rest of your posture ‘open’ instead of closed i.e. don’t cross your arms or legs. Look the speaker in the eyes. This is a great pose to use for job interviews.
These are just a few of the many speaking affirmations and power poses you can use to boost your confidence. Try them and see which ones work best for your personality and situation.
3. Talk to yourself – become your own cheerleader
Talking to yourself might sound like a weird idea but, it’s really not. Every human being talks to themselves all the time! Most people just don’t notice it. Whilst you’re awake, you have a multitude of thoughts running through your head. This is your self-talk and almost all of it is about you – who you are, what you are, what you want for lunch, the itch on your face.
What you say to yourself matters as it can build you up or tear you down. That’s why techniques such as affirmations work – they directly target what you say to yourself.
If you want to improve your self-confidence, you need to take charge of this stream of thoughts. Don’t depend on your unconscious to do it for you but rather become your own cheerleader.
How do you do this? Start purposefully talking to yourself. It doesn’t need to be aloud – talking to yourself silently is often as effective. Tell yourself good things about yourself. You’re a good person. You’re competent and incredibly capable. You’re amazing and can do whatever you want. You’re a good parent/employee/spouse/etc.
Make these things as specific as possible. If you’re currently trying to master a new skill, talk about how well you’re doing learning this.
Emphasise the attributes you’re trying to improve. Tell yourself you’re doing a good job, that you’re really trying hard, and that you’ll make it. When you fail, don’t berate yourself. Be understanding, kind, and gentle. Know that you tried your best, worked hard, and will achieve the goal next time.
If it helps, see yourself as the coach or the parent of someone you’re trying to help. Does putting someone down or being negative help them improve? No, of course not! So why would it help you? It won’t, of course. It will just make things worse. Treat yourself as you would want someone else to treat you.
Do this all the time. You don’t have to wait until something difficult or stressful comes up. Talk to yourself daily. Become your own best friend and a cheerleader any football team would envy. Your self-confidence will soar.
Categories: : Motivation